The story of God’s mercy and grace unto me.
I am simply a Christian, a husband, and a father. I am merely a man seeking to further know and walk with God. In the midst of who I am, I also compile words onto paper in the hopes that God would be glorified, the professing believer would be carried further in their desire to know Him, and that some may come to know Him for themselves.
Currently my family and I gather together with, and sit under the pastors and elders, of Grace Community Church in Bartlesville (although we also fellowship with believers from several churches). If you wish to learn more about God’s grace and mercy upon my life, read below. To view my books, click here.
“Sometimes, when I see some of the worst characters in the street, I feel as if my heart must burst forth in tears of gratitude that God has never let me act as they have done! I have thought, “If God had left me alone, and had not touched me by His grace, what a great sinner I would have been! I would have run to the utmost lengths of sin, dived into the very depths of evil. Nor would I have stopped at any vice or folly, if God had not restrained me!”
I feel that I would have been a very king of sinners, if God had left me alone. I cannot understand the reason why I am saved, except upon the ground that God would have it so. I cannot, if I look ever so earnestly, discover any kind of reason in myself why I should be a partaker of Divine grace.”
Before Christ –
Before God’s gracious and merciful regeneration of my life, I was a sinner to the fullest definition. For 21 years prior to being saved, I lived in a hellish deep dark depression that controlled my life which served to fuel my pride, my anger, my lust. I was a liar, a thief, an adulterer, a drunk, a malicious gossip and a flat out God hater. In my use, or abuse, of women, I was truly a murderer at heart – not physically, but spiritually. I cared only for my selfish, materialistic and prideful arrogance. I used profanity as communication, anger as a lifestyle and deceit as my justification. I grew up in the church and yet denied God. But praise be to God that He showed me, a miserable sinner, His grace, mercy and love. Only to Him is credit due!
His wake up –
On May 18th of 2001, God woke me from my stupor. While talking with Pastor Larry Sequin (Calvary de Taos, Taos, NM), God’s righteous conviction began to burn into my soul. I remember the exact verse that God used to execute His final blow of conviction just before His salvation. The blow left me never walking the same, talking the same nor acting the same. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.” (ESV) My life has never been the same.
Although I am not perfect, I am a new creation in Christ Jesus. Praise be to God that He convicts me as His child, in my weaknesses He works, and through His word He reveals His truth. I may fail, but I will not remain as a failure. My prayer is that God continues to convict me of my unrighteousness and that I bless His name for it. It is my prayer that I always follow hard after God and be sanctified through His Spirit. Oh to be held accountable as He did with Ezekiel (read Ezekiel chapter 3). So much of a need to still know God, more and more, to boast only in “knowing” Him (Jeremiah 9:23-24).
God why me?
Often I have asked this very question? I have many times said to the Lord, “Lord how is it that you are using me is such ways? I don’t have a clue what I am doing? I think you have the wrong man. O’ Lord help me!” Truth is the Lord can use rocks and donkeys to speak for Him. For the last couple of years, the Lord has brought all types of people my way. He has brought the homeless, addicts, demon oppressed and possessed. He has brought the sick, the tired and the weary. More times than not, He has brought men my way. Not just any men, but men who profess to be Christians. Oh that the Lord would make me more usable, a vessel of honor, and a man obedient unto His will.
Challenge to introspect –
Test yourself and see if Christ Himself is indeed a reality in your life. If so, live in the reality of having been saved. The reality of experiencing Christ’s conversion is to be, as a style of life, about the Father’s business and in unison with the Holy Spirit. It is good, quite literally, to pray and mourn for the souls of the lost. When mourning comes to an end, go out with the full gospel of truth and fight hell over those souls, expecting to win. Good biblical preaching is a warring with hell, preaching with uncontrolled passion, speaking boldly in the Spirit, declaring the full gospel and pleading for souls to repent.
I highly urge all believers to spend much time with the Lord over Matthew 7:21-23. These words of Christ are a warning to every professing believer! May these words never be spoken of you, “… I never knew you.” The only assurance you have in your Christian salvation is this, are you walking in the newness of the Lord Jesus Christ today, right now? Is the hope, the living Christ, indeed in you? Examine yourself – unless you are afraid that the truth is not in you – 2 Corinthians 13:5. Do you know Him, or just know of Him?
“Two things I ask of thee; deny them not to me before I die: Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food that is needful for me, lest I be full, and deny thee, and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’ or lest I be poor, and steal, and profane the name of my God.”
More about my story
(written after the passing of Pastor Larry, also printed in the Taos News Paper)
“Remember those who led you, who spoke the Word of God to you; and considering the result of their conduct, imitate their faith.”
In January of 2001, my girlfriend Patricia and I were brought to Taos to work at the Holy Cross Hospital as traveling x-ray technologists. Through our interactions with a co-worker, who was also a member of the Calvary de Taos, we started to attend Sunday morning services.
We found ourselves liking the music and especially gripped by Pastor Larry’s authentic love for the Gospel. After only a few weeks, I had asked Larry if he wanted me to play bass guitar. He looked at me with his big smile and asked, “So, tell me a bit about yourself.”
Although I had grown up in a form of the church, I knew nothing about what I was saying and Larry knew that too. He patiently listened with a smile hidden under his full mustache, his hands loosely clasped together while leaning on the sound board wall.
After I had exhausted what little knowledge I had, he simply said, “Well Jeremy, we should meet together and discuss this further.” A month later we met again.
The day was Friday, May 18, 2001. Within a matter of 30 minutes, Pastor Larry’s words drilled into my soul. My very heart had been pierced to the core. Because of Larry’s dedication to the Gospel and his Christ-like love for my soul, he showed me 1 Corinthians 6:9-10.
The power of the Gospel set me free that afternoon from drugs, binge drinking, rage, fornication and 21 years of deep, dark depression.
He shared with me part of his testimony. He did not judge me in my sin; he did not lead me in a simple sinner’s prayer; he did not give me three steps to salvation; nor did he tell me I was saved and right with God — No. Instead, he loved me enough to tell me the truth about Jesus Christ and to declare my awful state.
Later that night I shared what he said with my girlfriend. I shared what I believed the Lord had done.
After a lengthy discussion, we both went to bed, my girlfriend in the bedroom and myself on the couch. The next morning we stared at each other across the kitchen table with puzzling looks. We had not the foggiest idea of how to live for Christ.
I called Pastor Larry and he met us at the church building. We bought almost every book in the foyer that morning. Oh how little did we know what was before us, but this I knew, I was not who I was the night before.
Trish and I were married one year later, May 18, 2002. The Lord has taken us all over the US and we have shared our story with many. The Lord has caused me to write six Christian books, preach, blog, and set up websites for the glory of Christ Jesus.
We have worked with Voice of the Martyrs and as of late Gospel for Asia. We have been privileged to have met brothers and sisters in Christ from all over the world. We now home school our five children.
All of this is due to the Lord’s gracious hand and yet it all started though one dear brother in Christ, Pastor Larry. A man who cared more for His Lord and persevered forward in the true love of God, than take the easy road and leave me to myself. Because of his obedience, he forever charged the way to my freedom. Although we dare not worship anyone besides our God, we are to give honor to whom honor is due. (Romans13:7). So I leave you with this, “Saints, press on and keep your focus fixed!”
Larry, you will be missed by many and your good works here upon earth will not soon be forgotten.
“Let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” — Hebrews 12:1-2